Between the Pages
No. 50: It’s Nothing
Comic No. 50
M. Doyle – 8/5/19

Buy me a coffeeBuy me a coffee

Avenir Next speaks:
I guess it’s my turn. The others are all too busy, seemingly, whereas I’ve got nothing to do. Other villains - dang, there I go again. Let’s say "antagonists?" Other antagonists have plans, of which messing with the heroes (and later, actively trying to stop them stopping them) are only a part. Some want to rule the world, others want all the energon, a few want to open a gate to nameless dimensions and let ravening Elder Gods loose upon an unsuspecting populace. They’ve got Plan A to fall back on, when Plan B devolves into the protagonists faffing about solving interpersonal problems and growing as people.

And we’ve all gotten used to the planning vill- antagonists, haven’t we? The one with the schemes more intricate than the interlocking gears of a Swiss watch, that depend on uncontrollable miracles of timing to work at all. (I mean, seriously, some of these people must have "Initial Stage of Plans Working Out Amazingly in My Favor" as a super-power.)

But that’s not me. I’ve got no grand plan, I’m just poking the bear – or more accurately, the rabbit, shark and cat – to see what they’ll do. I mean, I’ve got a purpose, just not a plan.

So...what now? I’m tired of all my books, taking a break from social media, played all my video games during the last few resets. I could go for a walk, but there’s not much point, really. I’d play Solitaire, but I’m not past retirement age yet.

Bored bored bored.

Oh, well. The cat and the shark got close last time, didn’t they? At least, one of them realized something was going on. Maybe they’ll do better this time? Of course, the one who did the thinking is gone, now, so maybe not. Maybe I’ll be asking myself "what to do" all over again in a few days. Again.

Maybe I should take a cooking class.

News Feed:
50th comic, neat! (Now to achieve an equivalent number of readers...)

To that point, I’m reluctantly making another attempt to engage with FaceBook, and it’s going as well as you might expect. Minutes after creating a Between the Pages account, it was locked due to “suspicious activity.” At that point, the entirety of my interaction with the platform consisted of uploading a picture of Avenir as the user picture. I’m trying to imagine how that must have panicked them:

"Sir...sir! We’ve got a bunny, repeat we have a bunny!"

*A klaxon begins to wail*

"I knew this day would come eventually - lock it down, soldier, lock it down! And I pray to God we’re not too late.”

It is currently being held hostage until I upload additional documentation, including a photo I.D., which they assure me will be deleted “after a year.” I’m sure in the meantime that it will be stored responsibly and securely and not abused to send me any spam whatsoever. (I earned my Magistrix-level sarcasm plaque years ago, in case you’re wondering.)

So stay tuned! FaceBook page coming soon! Or never! Who can tell?
M Doyle, writer

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